Kameo Monson started writing for the public in 2012 when she agreed to write product reviews for a review blog. A writing enthusiast, she now spends her free time writing the stories swirling within her mind. In February 2020, Kameo won the Envie Magazine “What’s Your Story” contest. She has also authored four women’s fiction novels and is weeks away from releasing number five, the conclusion of her Finding Me series. Supported by her husband of twenty-five years, their four children, and a house full of pets, Kameo couldn’t be happier. Find out more about Kameo and her other works at KameoMonson.com!
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Kameo Monson • Aug 03, 2020
Leaping Lobsters: A Short Story
by Kameo Monson
Reaching into the closet, Hannah eyed the burgundy dress with the little pink and white flowers scattered across the shoulder and skirt. Too uncomfortable. If she was going to make it through meeting Ethan’s family that evening, she’d have to have some comfort. She slid a couple hangers across the bar. No. No. Nn… The white eyelet with a delicate ruffling at the empire waist brought a little extra warmth into her beating heart. Light and airy, the dress was both casual and elegant.
Ethan had told her about each of his family members, but the one she had to win over was Grandmother. Sophisticated, educated, and well-traveled Grandmother. Hannah heard prim, proud, and presumptuous. But Ethan loved his grandma more than anyone else. Maybe even her. And what dinner did Grandmother want for her birthday celebration? Lobster… cooked at home.
Hannah shuddered.
As she slid her feet into the red wedges, the doorbell rang. Scrunching her curls one more time, she hurried to the door.
“Hi,” Ethan said.
His gaze skimmed over the curves emphasized by her dress, then landed back on her face, the deep blue of his eyes sparkling. She’d chosen well.
“You ready?”
Her heart skipped one beat, then sped through three. She nodded and stepped outside.
Once settled in the car, Hannah curled her fingers around each other, twisting them into a knot. Ethan eased his hand down her wrist until it slipped into hers. She clung to him.
“Nervous?” he asked, opening the car door.
“Terrified. Tell me about your grandma again.”
“Well, I call her grandmother.” He winked. “She grew up in the Northeast, graduated from Yale, and traveled the world until she met Grandfather. And I’m her favorite. That last bit is the most important.”
“Uh-huh.” Hannah rolled her eyes. “She’ll hate me. I barely made it through city college, and… Ethan?”
Ethan spared her a glance as he drove.
“I grew up milking cows.”
He squeezed her hand, grinning. “I remember. Grandmother isn’t uppity. She’ll love you because I love you.”
Ethan pulled the car into a long driveway, and Hannah gawked at the house. The little two-bedroom home she’d scrimped to buy was the size of Grandmother’s tool shed.
She swallowed, urging her heart out of her throat and back down to her chest. “Any last-minute tips?”
“Whatever you do, don’t waste your lobster.”
“Don’t waste the lobster. Got it.”
The front door opened as Ethan reached for the handle.
“Edward!” Ethan turned to Hannah. “Hannah, this is my brother, feel free to ignore him all evening.”
Hannah dipped her head slightly. “Nice to meet you.”
“No being formal around me,” Edward tsked. “Ethan, the race is about the start. Hurry up.”
“Race?” Hannah asked, nudging Ethan’s shoulder.
“Shh. Grandmother doesn’t know about the race, but we have one every year. Come on. We’ve got to pick our lobsters.”
Out on the deck, an enormous pot sat atop an oversized propane burner. Next to it, Edward bent over a large storage tub. A second later, he pulled out a dripping-wet lobster.
Hannah cringed.
“Pick the one you want.” Ethan said.
“They’re alive?”
“Alive and screaming.”
She studied his eyes, a panic rising in her throat.
“Don’t worry. They don’t really scream.”
Ethan reached into the tub and pulled out a lobster. Both claws were wrapped with rubber bands.
“The ones whose tail curl when touched move faster,” he whispered.
All warmth drained from her face. “That one.” She pointed with her eyes closed, hoping Ethan didn’t notice.
“Good choice. What’s his name?”
Name? “Um, Bruno.”
“Fierce! I like it.” Ethan chuckled and led Hannah over to join the group standing behind a line of blue tape.
Three feet away, Edward stuck another strip of tape to the decking. “All right, everyone! First, Ethan brought a friend tonight, so introduce yourselves.” He turned to Hannah. “In case you forgot, I’m Edward.”
A woman a few years younger than Ethan grinned. “I’m Alyssa, these idiots’ sister.”
“Hey now, no need for name-calling,” Edward hooted.
Ethan shook his head and took Hannah by the hand. “These are my parents, Rochelle and William.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” Hannah said as they waved.
The light atmosphere and family fun helped put Hannah at ease for the first time that evening, and a genuine smile crossed her face as she moved closer to Ethan, who wrapped his arm around her. Together, they waited for Edward to continue his speech.
“Tonight’s race includes Chainsaw, Bruno, Chad, Lacy, Bottomly, and Lobbie. Everyone pick up your lobsters and place them on the line. The one closest to the end after two minutes wins.”
As Ethan picked up Chainsaw, Hannah knelt down and held Bruno.
At the count of three, she released him, whispering, “Good luck, Bruno.”
Hannah’s pulse raced as Bruno pulled ahead. Chainsaw sat on the starting line, refusing to move. Chad turned in circles as Lacy and Bottomly played clawsies in the middle. And Lobbie went right instead of forward.
“Chainsaw, get a move on!” Ethan called.
Hannah joined in, yelling, “Crawl, Bruno! Crawl!”
“Time!”
Hannah jumped up and down. Bruno had out crawled them all, nearly crossing the finish line.
“Way to pick your lobster, Hannah.” William said. “Is this the first time you’ve lobster raced?”
“It’s the first time I’ve lobster anything-ed.”
“Well, you certainly chose a winner!”
As Ethan finished putting Bruno and Chainsaw back in the tub, William caught his attention. “Go see Grandmother. We’ll handle getting dinner ready.”
Hannah smiled softly as Ethan took her hand. If his grandma was anything like the rest of his family, she’d be fine. Still, a little prick of nervousness alighted in her chest. What if Grandmother didn’t like her?
Outside the living room, Ethan pulled Hannah into a hug. “She already loves you—trust me—but she can come across as a little austere sometimes. It doesn’t mean anything. Promise.” He kissed her on the forehead.
Grandmother sat bolt upright in a wing-backed chair with a teacup in her hand. If Hannah hadn’t just won a lobster race, she might have looked around for Lady Mary Crawley.
For the next twenty-five minutes, Hannah’s nerves battled the tiny swords stabbing her lungs. Each breath came a little easier the longer Grandmother focused on Ethan and his plans for the future. When the room quieted, Hannah gathered her courage.
“Ethan says you traveled extensively before marriage. What was that like?”
“Pleasant.”
“Did you have a favorite country?”
“Of course.”
Short answers. Hannah traced the pattern on her skirt with her finger.
“Have you traveled since?” Hannah asked.
“Occasionally.”
“I’m sure that was nice.”
“It was pleasant.”
Hannah worked to keep her smile from faltering, aware of her chest as it lifted and fell with each breath. Grandmother didn’t like her. Why would she? She was educated and sophisticated… Hannah was neither.
“Dinner’s ready,” Alyssa said, poking her head into the room. “Ethan, help Grandmother.”
A few minutes later, Ethan and Hannah sat at the table across from Grandmother, and Alyssa placed a full dinner plate in front of Hannah. The corn on the cob and broccoli fuzzed from Hannah’s site as her gaze fell to the lobster’s lifeless eyes. His charcoal color had turned bright red, and he no longer twitched his antenna.
She’d murdered Bruno!
“I…Ethan, that’s…”
“Bruno. You chose him.” He squeezed her hand. “Don’t worry, he didn’t feel any pain, I don’t think.”
“You don’t think?”
How could she eat Bruno? Bruno, the lobster who’d inched closest to the finish line just for her. Poor little red, now-dead Bruno. She blinked rapidly, staving off tears.
Don’t waste the lobster. Ethan’s words haunted her.
She had no choice. She had to eat Bruno.
Hannah startled when crushing snaps struck her eardrums. Grandmother had picked up her lobster by the head and tail and ripped it in two. Juice ran down her palm toward her wrist.
Eww.
“Do you want me to break yours down for you?” Ethan asked.
“N-no.” Hannah swallowed. “I can do it.”
Picking up her lobster, she made the mistake of looking him in the eye. Her breathing quickened as her mouth soured. How could she eat anything? “I’m so sorry, Bruno.”
With the tail in her right hand and the head firmly in her left, Hannah twisted the lobster in half. The move had been simple, and as she worked to remove the legs and claws, it became easier. Soon, all that was left of Bruno were two claw legs and a tail.
Ethan watched in awe. “Great job!”
“I researched how to do it this week.”
“Try it. It’s like crab, but better.”
Breaking into the joints of one of the claw legs, Hannah used her cocktail fork to remove a small piece of meat. It looked like crab. She swirled it in butter, then slid it into her mouth. The table quieted. A sweet-yet-salty butter flavor coated her tongue, the meat tender and easy to chew. Hannah lowered her shoulders as she smiled. “It’s delicious.”
The announcement brought the corner of Grandmother’s lips up. Maybe Hannah had a chance after all.
On the side of her plate, Hannah placed the large claw. It held the sweetest, most tender meat, and she wanted it last.
The light conversation lifted Hannah’s spirits, and she joined in, telling a couple of stories of her own. The favorite included a cow, Norma, who crossed cattle guards easier than she did.
Once most of her plate was cleared, Hannah reached for the claw she’d set aside. Her mouth watered in response. Bruno was truly delicious. Though she might never name a lobster again, she still wanted to savor every bite. With the seafood cracker in place, Hannah squeezed the handles together. Nothing moved. She tried again, adding pressure with both hands.
The sound of snapping shell pummeled her ears, and she jumped. Looking up, she watched as two large flying lobster bits soared toward Grandmother.
Don’t waste the lobster.
Hannah glanced at the crackers. “It’s okay! I have all the meat!”
An FLB smacked Grandmother’s forehead, then fell to the table with a thud. Lobster juice ran down her nose to her chin.
Hannah’s cheeks burned, and she fled from the table after muttering an apology.
It’s okay! I have all the meat! How could she say that? The meat didn’t matter. She’d shelled Grandmother!
In the bathroom, she allowed the tears to stream down her face and gather at the base of her neck. Ethan’s grandma would never speak to her again, and Hannah had finally made progress—the old woman had smiled… once. She wasn’t smiling now. Hannah would never earn another smile.
Goodbye Ethan.
She sniffed.
Someone knocked on the door, and Hannah lowered her head, shaking it before responding. “Just a minute.”
“Come out please, Hannah. The good tissues are with me.”
Grandmother?
Hannah smoothed out her dress, which now had little pink specks on the bodice, then opened the door a crack. “I’m really sorry. I’ve—”
“This is by far, my favorite birthday. You have nothing to apologize for.” Grandmother said, pulling Hannah into the hallway and handing her a tissue. “Growing up, we ate lobster while sitting on the beach. Plenty of lobster guts have hit me.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t want to waste anything. That’s why I said—”
Grandmother chuckled. “Makes for a great story, don’t you think?”
Tears welled in Hannah’s eyes.
“Well, it will one day.” She eyed Hannah. “Tell me, what do you call your grandmother?”
“Nana.”
Grandmother paused, grumbling under her breath, but before Hannah could speak she said, “Oh! Congratulations on winning the lobster race, by the way.”
“I…I thought…”
“I’m not supposed to know about it. But I watch it every year from the window.”
Hannah raised her brow in surprise.
“Sometimes children need to have fun with their parents. Besides, I like watching them laugh and tease each other. They do it in front of me too. You saw them at dinner.” Grandmother patted her arm. “But it’s better when they think they’re getting away with something.”
Hannah pursed her lips, stopping her on-coming laughter. “Do they know you’re not the stuffy, old woman who sits bolt upright while drinking tea?”
“Individually? Yes. Collectively? No. They each think they’re my favorite and that I only have fun with them.”
Hannah chuckled, and her laughter grew louder with each passing second.
“Shh.” Grandmother shook her hand at her. “You’ll keep my secret, won’t you? Can you imagine how sad they’d be if they found out I have five favorites?”
“I’ll keep your secret, but you’d better go back to the table, you old grouse. And Grammy, thank you for sharing your secret with me.”
:It’s the beauty of Disney – it holds different memories… different meanings… for everyone."
"I can almost envision Alice and I walking hand in hand among the croquet match, listening to the Queen of Hearts demand her bounty of rolling heads, and trying to make heads and tails of who is winning the confounded game. Am I leading her to safety or is she leading me?"
"While many critics and fans laud the technological advances of this franchise, the moving and uniquely relevant story often gets overlooked."
Being unique. Together.
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